i didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes,
i just held you in the doorframe through all of the earthquakes

how do you find out if someone is dead?

the antlers - two




i just returned from an incredible trip to ohio. there were lots of pretty things and abandoned things, even an abandoned amusement park. once i finish editing all of the pictures maybe i will post a photographic-adventure-tour thing.



theres a heaven and

this is a post about being very excited about a lot of things.

someone still loves you boris yeltsin - pangea




i left that message in glow in the dark letters on the roof of a building in a forest three summers ago and i went back last week and it was still there. but i couldn't find the canyon i climbed up when i was thirteen, so maybe i made it up in my head, but i swear it was there, and so were all these hollowed out trees you could hide in, and a field at dusk full of fireflies going up. i like what a huge field faraway looks like just when it's starting to get dark, and there's a million fireflies and you understand why they're called lightning bugs, like little zaps and sparks out of every corner of your eye, something tiny and electric in the organic dark. we drove around last night while it was half-raining and found a look-out-point, and big empty fields expanding to a pitch black horizon, and tiny crowded neighborhoods on riverfronts where every single person owns a boat. listening to def leppard and hands reaching out the window.

this summer has been less than epic and i didn't really notice that it's almost over. i didn't even really notice it started. it's been so cold and rainy but i really really like that. i want every summer to feel like the beginning of summer, like june is just starting and i've been hopeful all the time. it's not like last summer which was epic in this sad way, sad in this way that i got hysteric sometimes and i would laugh a lot and not think and see six red foxes in a grey cemetery, slumped against headstones. and then i couldn't wait for it to end, to move on and out and get to the city, and now i sortof miss it, like it was this tiny cute sad chapter of things and i get nostalgic for just about anything. summers especially. maybe i'll just remember this one as calm and sweet and undefined and i'd be okay with that. but maybe it's verging on some hidden epic event, some turning point, something is about to begin.

i like sitting on train tracks and writing secrets on rocks and throwing them, and rickety metal pole playgrounds that aren't safe or made of plastic; forest fortresses and looking up walking distance on google maps from where i am to somewhere i am not. it would take me 27 days and 14 hours to get to portland oregon, 49 days and 3 hours to anchorage alaska. only 4 days and 4 hours to detroit, the great smoky mountains 8 days on the dot. it doesn't seem that long. but it'd take me longer i think because i'd get distracted and stop off the road for so many things and my legs are small. horoscopes are weird, it said my best days for love this month were july 10 and july 18/19. i don't know, i guess i see it.

jessica lea mayfield - for today




when it's like butterflies, everything seems alright

shack - undecided



hi, my name is cari and this is my new blog thing. i don't really understand blogs yet, and actually i don't really like the word blog, but i am going to try this anyway. i will probably post pictures and sometimes songs and talk about my adventures and other things like that. i probably won't have opinions on world events or cultural observations. i'm not really like that. if you don't like it, that is okay. okay!

if you want to know, i am a 20 year old girl who lives in a small town in the midwest.
i'm mostly this:



My photo
illinois, United States
the fabulous destiny of cari ann wayman

all pictures by me unless otherwise stated.
all music is for sampling purposes only. please buy the records. if you are a musician and want your song removed, let me know.